The secret to Lord Big Dave’s glossy puce complexion? A lack of conscience

David Cameron’s superficiality allows him to hover above the surface, floating on bland meaningless generalisations

Maybe it’s all down to Botox. A daily dose of a hundred tiny needles. Or perhaps, in some dusty attic back in Chipping Norton there’s a portrait that is visibly ageing by the hour. A mirror image of the Picture of Dorian Gray.

Most former world leaders look like shit after six years in the job. The pressures of work ravage their face. Tony Blair looks like a hollowed-out skull. Even after three years, Boris Johnson looked like Boris Johnson. That bad. But David – make that Lord – Cameron is the remarkable exception. His complexion is still a glossy puce. Barely a wrinkle to be seen.

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